Why is Sarah, the Duchess of York, So Relate-able?

WARNING!  You are about to read a post where opinions are expressed very graphically & are for entertainment purposes only.  The opinions of the author and the comments that follow are not meant to defame or harm the reputations of the subjects of the post, but merely to entertain.  These are opinions only and are not based upon fact.  Brace yourself.


We all love Sarah, the Duchess of York, because she’s so open and vulnerable, likeable and full of the same kinds of mistakes we all make.  Her life hangs in the balance, as so many of ours do.  We’re all open and afraid, suffering losses, downsizing, moving in with parents, unemployed.  We can all relate to this story in so very many ways.

Sarah, The Duchess of York

Close to homelessness, she’s relying on the kindness of Prince Andrew, the Duke of York, her ex-husband, who has graciously opened his home to her and why would he after she tried to sell him out for $500,000 pounds?

…because he knows her and he knows she is a trustworthy soul.  She’s not a thief and she truly has his best interests at heart.  She did a desperate act and when people are desperate they do stupid things.

Over the years Prince Andrew has learned that underneath that public persona is the girl he fell in love with…a very real and sensitive girl and this real girl is the girl we are all getting to meet in her docu-series “On Finding Sarah”.

The journey of finding ourselves is something we all get to do in life.  We get lost.  We journey.  We find ourselves again.  Sarah is broken.  We are broken.  She came to her knees…we all will one day come to our knees.

The thing that makes Sarah’s story so relate-able is that she really is not alone, is she?

She’s filled with self-sabotage and we all are.  We all play tapes in our head that play over and over again.  At first, they don’t seem to be so bad “I’m gaining a little weight, I need to start watching what I’m eating” becomes “you’re fat and you’ll never be able to lose weight”.  Once we believe that, we give up and let ourselves go, becoming fat.

Sarah felt that once she was a Princess she had to be perfect in every way.  She felt wretchedness in “not feeling right” and not living up to those standards.

In this series, Sarah is opening her heart to the whole world and is willing to become completely authentic in her search for herself.  In order to do so, she elicits the help of Dr. Phil and Suze Orman.

Dr. Phil says “So, what’s not working in your life?” and Sarah responds ” My head…because I live with nostalgic regrets about everything.”  She recognizes that the news of her selling Prince Andrew out is what truly brought her to her knees and liberated her.  The exposure caused her such remorse for all the pain she had caused to her ex and the Royal family.  She felt ludicrous.

In life, we all try to put our best foot forward.  Every one of us has a personal truth and our personal truth is what we really feel about ourselves when nobody is listening, when nobody is looking.  It’s what we feel about ourselves and a damaged personal truth will generate results that match that truth.

So the question becomes “What is your personal truth?”

When we grow up people write on a slate those things that define us and those things become our personal truth…our parents, our teachers, our coaches all write what they think about us on “a slate”.  The most tragic thing of all is that we then pick up the pen and start writing the very same things they have been writing about us.  We begin to believe everything they have said about us.  We become damaged.

This is where our journey is exactly like Sarah’s.  We have to heal the damage.  How? …by getting very, very honest about our internal dialogue and figuring out what we’re saying to ourselves that is causing our reality, our results.

Like all of us at some point in our lives, Sarah is completely lost.  Amid the trappings of castles, palaces, cars, planes and wine she got trapped in the spotlight of the paparazzi and her self worth became defined by what they said about her.  She was “The Duchess of Pork” and “Frumpie Fergie”.  She then began writing those same things on her own slate and she became those things, concerned about what everyone else was saying about her and forgetting what it was that she knew about herself.

Growing up a much lesser-known Royal, it is something I can relate to. What “they” think becomes important because it reflects on the family.  What “they” think becomes more important than what you think.

The growth comes when we no longer care about what people think or say about us.

Like Sarah, we get to make the choice and there is only one person who can fix us.

It becomes worth it for us to follow this journey with Sarah and ask some of the same important life questions.  Like Sarah,we may discover that we are something completely different than what we thought we were and wouldn’t that be a fantastic gift of self-discovery?